Resting bitch face

I have resting bitch face, also known as RBF, and it’s terminal.

I have been told in my annual evals that I need to work on my “non-verbal communication”. Translation: “fix your damn face woman!” I blame nursing for my RBF. You probably have it too.

I am not only responsible for collaborating with the family of my patients, but also with the interdisciplinary team. Have you ever had to deal with a family member that insists that you know that their “cousin/sister/brother/daughter” works in health care, as if it is going to change how you care for their family?  It happens faaaaaaarrrrrr too often in the ICU. Typically my reaction is this:

I am glad that your cousin is a CNA in a nursing home. Really, I am. However, this is an ICU and things are a tad bit different here. My other favorite is when I have to talk to one of the residents about something I need ordered, and instead they want to peacock around and tell me why they don’t think it’s necessary DESPITE the fact that the attending has already agreed that what I want for my patient would be beneficial. Once again my facial expressions look something like this while they are over-explaining things:

Look, bruh, I know what hydralazine does. I know how it works. I am asking for it because I need to control his BP but his heart rate is like, 58, and maybe metoprolol isn’t the best idea. AND I ALREADY ASKED THE ATTENDING ABOUT IT WHEN HE WALKED THROUGH THE UNIT DOING HIS ROUNDS, just give me the damn meds!

Yeah. I have yet to figure out the whole “poker face” thing. Seven years of nursing and I will still look at you like you’re stupid.

So, to my new nurses, just know that if you don’t have RBF, you will. It won’t be on purpose. One day someone will say or do something so dumb that you just can’t hide your feelings. It is normal. Just about every nurse I know either admits to having RBF or has had a coworker with RBF. It just sort of happens. Don’t beat yourself up over it.