How are you doing?

Those of us in the medical field wearing down. It’s been *GO GO GO!* for so long now that we are starting to run out of steam.

We only have so much to give and we are giving our all. I know we are supposed to be #NurseStrong and all, but this pandemic is really testing our strength.

Now more that ever we need to be checking on each other. If your coworker seems different or they may have lost that smile that they’ve always had, take a moment to check on them. They may talk to you or they may not, at least you made an effort to check-in.

Some people are very reserved about how they are feeling *raises hand* and keep everything in because they may feel they can fix it themselves, or they may have had their trust broken by someone they previously confided in, ask anyway. Or it may be the total opposite and the coworker breaks down in front of you because they have been waiting for someone to ask if they are ok. The coworker may not breakdown but opens up about how they are truly feeling. Just know that checking up on someone shows you care.

In the medical field, we need each other. This is going to be a long fight and we have to make sure each of us can make it to the finish line. Things are tough for us right now but we can give each other the strength to survive this.

The vaccine is here, why I haven’t gotten it yet…

Two vaccines have arrived to help with this COVID outbreak, one from Pfizer and one from Moderna. I have signed up for neither.

I know as a nurse I should be one of the first to get out there and get vaccinated. However, I still have questions that I needed answers for and only recently have I starting finding the answers. I wanted to know more about side effects, how many participated in the studies, how is the vaccine supposed to work?

There is also one other thing that has been holding me back; I am black and I have an inherent distrust of the medical system, the very system I am a part of as a nurse. Learning about things such as the “Tuskegee experiment”, seeing how many times the healthcare system has failed black women, seeing in person how implicit bias plays a role in how medical professionals treat people of color, realizing that there was only a small amount of people of color (9.8%) were actually in the Pfizer study, all make me wary.

I want to trust the science behind the vaccine. I want to trust the medical system. I want to believe in the potential of finally getting this pandemic under control. I also want to feel safe.